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Page 1 | Page 2 It was a night like any other. Well, not really. It was Saturday yes, but I was headed out with Mike Lowell and Al, to Providence not Wootown. The plan was Mike Lowell would pick Al and I up at approximately 7:30pm. He arrived at the HOT Mansion at around 8:45pm, with Al already in tow. We had a solid hour drive in front of us. We were headed to the illustrious Club Fantasies to see some HOT ladies strut their stuff. On the road, we each had a couple of dixie cup shots of delicious Jim Beam. I mean, who goes to a strip club sober, really. We arrived in good time and headed for the door. There was a $20 cover charge, which the doorman almost got out of the HOT. Several of the 'dancers' came over to the door and informed him of who I was. "You can't charge him!", they exclaimed, "That's HOT Karl, didn't you know that?" "Oh, I'm so sorry HOT Karl, I didn't recognize you. I didn't know you had shaved off the HOT." , he apologized. "Well, I'll let it slide this time. But don't let it happen again!", I said, "Now ladies, let's see those tits!" With that Al, Mike Lowell, and I were escorted to a table by five HOT topless ladies. The 'waitress' came over and took our drink orders. A Bud for Mike Lowell, a Corona for Al, and a Bud light for myself. The waitress returned quickly with our beers, all cans. But no lime for the corona, in a can. Al had stepped away for a moment to use the can, so I had the waitress bring over a lime. Moments later she was back with the lime, on a moist napkin. Al, having the disability of not being able to read restroom signs, headed into the ladies room. He quickly realized his mistake and came back out with his head hung. Mike Lowell and I had a good laugh at his expense. The feature that evening was a bonified porn star, Jade St. Claire. The DJ announced her coming on stage. She exploded on to the stage, obviously running on pure adrenaline, and not the 8 ball she had just sucked up her nose. She was wearing one of the bulkiest stripper, sorry 'dancer', outfits that any of us had seen. She paraded around the stage in it for about thirty seconds before cutting it loose. She grabbed the microphone and started harassing the audience to stand up if they wanted some tits in their face. After she made her rounds of slapping faces with her tits, she started bringing people up on stage. She had the lie down and she rubbed her vag on their faces. For a fiver, your face could go where hundreds had come before. One guy was incessant with his tongue, so she stuck her ass on his mouth. Mmm porn star asshole, now that's tasty. After about five minutes, she headed off and the broom guy came up to sweep up all the cash. Several beers later we determined that it was time to go sit by the stage and get some tits rubbed in our faces. So we did. As all the ladies know HOT Karl, they flocked over to us and gave us some extra attention. We had fun with that for a while, getting HOT tits rubbed all over, and putting dollar bills where they don't belong. Good times. Eventually we each broke off for some lapdances. Mike Lowell, naturally went for the tall brunette. Al grabbed some old blonde chick. I, HOT, was sucked up by this tall number with a nice red HOT outfit on. Gotta go for the red. She navigated me over to one of the booths. Being HOT Karl, the ladies know what I want, so she got naked. She started dancing around a little, then rubbing all up on my shit. "Oooh!, HOT Karl, you're making me all HOT!", she moaned. She flipped around, and I noticed a nice snail trail on my leg. "And wet too I see", I replied. "Oh, so wet!", she confirmed. Then she started grabbing at my cock-n-balls, "Oooh, how do you like that!", she touted. "I like it just fine." "I think I might just have to finish you off right here!" "I don't know, do you think you can handle a HOT Karl from HOT Karl?" "Oooh! HOT, I'll give it a shot!" "No, I'll give you a shot all over your face, after you lick the shit off my dick!" After I fucked her in the ass, raw dog of course, and covered her face with shit, and my load, I left her there, twitching in the booth. I headed back to the table to find Al and Mike Lowell sucking down a couple more cold ones. "So, you get the usual?", queried Al. "Of course", I replied, "She's not gonna shit right for a week." "Nice!", chimed in Mike Lowell. "So you guys ready to go?" "Yeah, time for a little Dunkies to wash off the smell of stripper", Al replied. With that we headed out. I awoke the next morning to find that I had mixed up a tall glass of Nog the night before, with the remainder of the Jim, and made a ham sandwich. Neither of these had been touched. I downed the Nog, ate the sandwich, rubbed one out all over the cat, and started my day. It was a night like any other, except that it was 9pm and I was still mostly sober. Hamilton and D were headed over for some HOT drinking action. Upon arrival we decided that we should play some beirut, and realized there were only about 20 beers. So we hopped in the HOTomobile and headed to the booze store where we picked up a 30 rack of The Silver Bullet and some McLightUltra. I expertly guided the HOTomobile back to the house and Hamilton and myself began some heads up beirut. After a few games Tony, Damone, and AC arrived. Tony and Damone joined in the highly charged beirut action. After a few more games we headed out to the bar to meet up with Creegan and Toni. I headed out first, since AC was still primping herself. I manuevered the HOTomobile like a champ through the streets of Wootown and parked my coach in the usual spot directly right in front of the bar. As I exited the HOTomobile and headed to the door, the girl sitting there said, "HOT Karl, I love your HOT Rod." "They ladies all love HOT Karl's HOT Rod", I replied. "Ooo, HOT Karl I wanna take your HOT Rod for a ride.", she chirped. "I think I could oblige you in that matter." "Delicious! Follow me." With that we headed to the women's room, giving Creegan and Toni a wave hello as we passed by. All of the stalls were occupied, so she pushed me up against the sink and dropped to her knees and began servicing me. Once a stalled opened up, I took her in there and gave her a HOT wet HOT Karl. After I finished I zipped up and headed out, leaving her sitting on the toilet, slumped up against the side of the stall, twitching in ecstacy. As I exited the bathroom, to a round of applause from everyone in the bar, I saw that Tony, Damone, and AC had already arrived. I greeted everyone and turned to the bartender for a Guiness. "You must be exhausted.", she commented. "No, that was just a warm up.", I replied. "Oh, well maybe I can get you HOT." "Well I am HOT Karl, but you could give it a shot. I just need a few beers first, cuz you won't be able to serve beer when I'm done with you." "Ok, but don't make me wait too long." So I turned back to my friends and had a few more Guiness. I then took her in the back room and gave her a stern rogering. Leaving her, as usual, twitching in a corner I headed back to the group. "Well, we better head out, the bartender's not gonna be pouring any more drinks tonight.", I said. With that we headed out, Tony and AC in one car and Damone with me. While perfectly negotiating the mean streets of the Woo, we came upon a gray Solara that wished to challege the HOT Rod. Of course the Solara was no match for the A6 HOTomobile, or HOT Karl's superb driving skills. At the next light I heard a beep from the car next to me. I looked to see that it was the Solara with a black man giving me the thumbs up. I simply turned to Damone and we both broke into laughter. I let him have his glory as he took off once the light turned. We caught up with him at the last light before the house. He was ahead of us, the first car at the light, and Tony and AC were behind. I began reving my engine, spooling the turbos, hitting a solid 6000rpms, and burning about $20 in gas. When the light turned, I let the clutch out, and left a patch behind. I blew him off the line, passing him within seconds. Since I was on the wrong side of the road I put my directional on and pulled in front of the Solara. Just then we came upon the turn, so I casually slowed put on my blinker and turned down my street. The evening was beginning earlier than usual as our event of the evening was starting at 8. We were headed to Wootown's illustrious Palladium to see Rockstar's band, Bayside, play. As usual we were running behind schedule since AC decided to take a shower 5 minutes before we had to leave. Once she had finished primping herself up, AC, Tony, Jono, and I all saddled up into the HOTomobile and headed out. We arrived with mere minutes to spare before the show started. Exiting the HOTomobile, we met up with Mini Driver as we walked to the illustrious Palladium. We rendezvoused with Pastey in front of the illustrious Palladium to find that the show was sold out. Luckily since I'm HOT Karl, and we know Rockstar it was no problem getting in backstage. Unfortunately, since AC's even abreviated shower took nearly 20 minutes, we had missed Bayside's set. But we were still backstage partying with rockstars. After watching the next act for a couple of songs, we retired to Rockstar's VIP room. We found Rockstar, his stripper 'friend', a few other hu ha's and some of our other cronies already there. Since Rockstar is a rockstar, he was sauntering around with a bottle of Maker's Mark, passing out shots as he went. It was a typical night of boozing and whoring, with the added bonus of being backstage in the VIP room. We tore things up there for a while, and then as we were getting ready to leave, we found out that Rockstar would be making a cameo appearance with the headliner for the night. So everyone headed down to the stage and waited to see Rockstar rock out. As we decended the steps, I caught the eye of a HOT little number with big cans. I stopped to talk to her as everyone else continued on. "You're HOT Karl, right?", she queried. "Why yes I am, and you're just HOT.", I replied, "Listen honey, I'm heading down to the stage to see Rockstar's cameo. You should come with me." "OOOO! I'd love to come with you HOT Karl!", she chirped. With that we continued on down to the stage. When we got there, she led me behind the dummer's riser. "OOO! HOT Karl, I want your big meaty hog.", she moaned as she grabbed my member. "I think that can be arranged", I replied coolly, "Hey honey, do you, uh, fuck ass?" "Mmmm! hmmmm!" She dropped to her knees and started sucking like a hoover. After my piece was all hard and wet, I stood her up, turned her around and fucked her in the ass. It slid right in, with the aid of the film of her saliva, and I pumped her to the beat of the snare. After I blew my load all over her face, I noticed my gang of cronies off to the side of the stage, so I zipped up and headed over. I got there just in time to see Rockstar rocking out. After he was done, Tony, AC, Jono, Mini Driver, and I decided to head out to a bar. We bid our fairwells to the rest of the group and headed off. In passing behind the drummer, Tony noticed a girl twiching and writhing on the floor. "This looks like the work of HOT Karl!", he remarked. "Ah yes it is", I replied. We arrived at our favorite watering hole, Creegan's Pub, in good time. As we're regulars there we walked right in. I went up to the bar to get drinks, and the HOT bartender greeted me. "A Murphy's for HOT Karl tonight?" "But of course, you sexy bitch.", I chimed, "plus a round for my friends". "Coming right up." We began putting them back, with Tony far in the lead, as he had been taking pulls from Rockstar's whiskey. He was on the verge of belligerence. As it was Jono's birthday, Tony decided to pick him up, which he then proceeded to do. This got him all pumped up and decided that picking people up was the thing to do. Thusly he picked up AC and carried her around a bit. Fortunately the bar was only somewhat full, so we were able to make a bit of a scene. Tony then decided to pick up the HOT. He should have stopped with this in the idea phase, though for the sake of entertainment I went along with it. He bent down to pick me up at the waist. Just as he got me a few inches off the floor, he toppled backwards and fell to the ground. Laughter ensued. Not to be dissuaded, he tried once again to pick me up. Though this time, the drunkness overcame his mind and he gave up on his venture. After stopping by the pizza joint down the street, with Tony insulting nearly everone in the place, including calling an Indian acquaintance of his and AC, 'Navajo Joe', we decided it was time to retire for the evening. We headed out, Tony, Jono and I in the HOTomobile, and AC and Mini Driver in Mini's car. We were dropping Jono off at his place before heading back to the ranchero. We dropped Jono off, and head back home. As we turned down our street, we noticed what looked like headlights at the end, by our house. It seemed odd that it would have taken AC and Mini Driver that long to get back to our place. As we got closer, we noticed that it was actually several cars, with highly reflected signage on the sides of the cars. It read 'Worcester Police'. Tony remarked, "Is that cops?". "Yeah.", I replied, "Looks like about four cruisers." "Huh", exclaimed Tony, "Let's just park here". "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea" We parked about four or five houses down from our place and walked the rest of the way, as we didn't want to deal with the cops over our night of indulgence. While we were approaching, a spot light suddenly was turned in our direction. One of the cops questioned, "You guys know Paulie?". "You mean AC?", replied Tony. "Yeah that's it" "Yeah, we live here with her" "Ok, well your other roommate thought he heard someone in the house, but it turned out to just be her." "Oh, ok, sorry about that" "Don't worry about it." With that laughter consumed the cops, and Tony and I entered the house. We found AC and Mike Lowell standing in the foyer, both in bathrobes, and AC's hair wet from the shower. Mike Lowell, who had stayed in that night, had heard someone in the house, who's footsteps did not sound like AC's. They had more of a stumbling sound, like she was shitfaced, as AC was. Mike Lowell, fearing that someone had broken in to steal the mountains of presents sitting in our downstairs front living room, and then decided to take a shower, called the police. one It was a Thursday evening, and I donned my eye heart box shirt in the men's room at work before I headed out. As I walked through the reception area the new secretary with the great ass caught a glimsp of my shirt and gave a little giggle. I shot her back a glanced, and I watched her face as she realized that I would be giving her a stern rogering the next day. I would have taken care of business just then, but I had a schedule to keep. I was headed to meet up with Creegan and then head in to Boston for the Kid Rock show that night. Upon arrival in Boston we headed to the bar where Mark and Vendini were already half in the bag. As we waited in line to get in, a, hopefully, homeless guy walked by shouting, "Beat me up for a dollar! Kick my ass for a buck!". So I gave him two dollars and Creegan and I kicked the shit out of the guy. We finally made it inside and met up with Mark and Vendini. We grabbed a few beers and shot the shit for a while before it was time to head to the show. Creegan and I headed out and would meet up with the other two in the show, Vendini was trying to score some cooch. Once we made it inside the venue we grabbed a couple slices and a couple delicious Bud Lights, and headed to our seats. We made our way down to the floor and found our seats, next to which turned out to be a couple of skank hoes. How did I know they were skank hoes you ask? I can smell a skank ho at a hundred paces. After the shitty openner finished and Kid Rock's sound check was going on, I headed to the head to take a piss. Upon exiting the restroom I noticed one of the skank hoes standing there, the more attractive one to be specific. She came over to me and said, "HOT Karl, I wanna suck your cock". To which I obliged, though not before fucking her in the ass. Everyone in the hall applauded as I left her twitching and cover in my load slumped up against the wall. When I arrived back at my seat the other skank ho questioned me about her skank ho friends whereabouts. To which I replied, "She's up there in the hall, twitching". "What the hell happened? I thought she was gonna blow you?" "I gave her a HOT Karl. And that's what happens when you get a HOT Karl from HOT Karl". |
